AT LAST!
The IT PACKET DIDDLER!!!
Since man first crawled out of the slime, he has dreamed...
Now he can stop dreaming.
The IT PACKET DIDDLER is here.

How does it work?

  • transistorized fruit flies
  • plasma / binary interface module
  • VERY large magnets

Why do I want it?

  • the future is passing you by
  • your competitors want you not to want it
  • fruit flies

What about the Dimfox Diddler?

  • linked to spontaneous embolisms
  • juvenile crime
  • and mass extinctions

OK, OK! But What Do I Have to do to GET IT?

  • cover your extremities with zinc oxide
  • secure your microprocessor with duct tape
  • clear away children and nursing mothers .... now CLICK

YES!Tell me about BUZZ JACKSON, founder of PACKET DIDDLER INC.
YES! I'd like to send my comments to David Coppard publicity coordinator for BUZZ JACKSON


last modified: A Week Ago Tuesday
disclaimer: this site does not exist: it is a mere emanation of your own being, as is your computer, your grandmother, the universe, that thing on your leg - indeed, what you call 'reality' is really just a complicated, meandering dream you are having, one with no real plot and a real downer of an ending. In fact, while you are dreaming this sentence, the real 'you' is lying face down in a twelve dimensional pool of vomit while a vagrant named &&&&^, whose face is a big digital clock forever stuck at 56:99, is stealing a quadratic equation from your left ventricle. This sentence is your unconscious telling you to wake your sorry ass up before he takes off with it and you end up as an imaginary number in a really crappy dimension. I SAID WAKE UP! WAKE UP!

Oh, screw it. So... what's on the tube tonight? I could sure go for a burger. What's this thing on my leg?

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